Okay, be sure to scroll below for more pictures--I can only post about 5 at a time so I had to split them.

Well, sorry to leave everyone hanging!! Can I say that 4 kids is a lot of kids??? Maybe you knew that! I can usually get Lilla and Hope Song Yi to stay in their room/our room (we split them for rest time) for about an hour each day. Unfortunately I spend that hour making appointments! I think that will get better as time goes on. Right now I have about 24 minutes until the timer is up so I will be fast!

Things have been going well, definitely a two steps forward, one step back feeling. We have had 2 more of the irrational-I've-lost-my-mind tantrums (not me, Hope) and I have noticed they definitely come late in the day when she is hungry and/or tired. One was when she said she did NOT want a bath, so I said okay, but if you don't come now, no bath. And I know she understood and she said, okay, no bath. Lots of acting and hand motions. Well, right as Lilla's water is draining, here she comes wanting a bath. I felt I had to stick to what I said so I didn't let her take a bath. The next 30 minutes were very pitiful, and included a toothbrush and PJ standoff. I "won"--I decided if I said brush your teeth, it has to happen. I go into like a...well, I would say zen, but I think it is the holy spirit...type place and I just feel like I can wait and wait and wait until we can get through what we need to do. The trouble comes if I need to be somewhere on time! Finally she opened up and I brushed for about 3 seconds just to say I did it. followed by 20 minutes of wailing. But I just held her again like before and she finally calmed down and the sun came out.

It is definitely a battle of wills. Thankfully though she is pretty willing to choose from what we offer and go where we need to go (orange or apple? walk or ride in the stroller? mommy buckles you or Landon? I never thought Love and Logic would come in so handy!!) but it is when she refuses to move or doesn't want what is there and we have to choose for her that we have troubles. She can be STUBBORN and if looks could kill, well, our house would be pretty empty because we have all been on the receiving end of her glares.

BUT she is so loving and open and trusting that we just WANT to help her get through whatever it is. Jake has been awesome and she loves when he lifts her out of the car or helps her do something. And if Landon pulls her hand and says "Let's Go!" she comes. Today we went to the pet store and Jake and Landon had fun showing her all the animals and Landon shared his chicken nuggets with her today when she didn't like what I ordered her. So sweet.

She is speaking English more and more and the hybrids are funny. Yesterday we were doing these little dress up bears and she kept saying "Wo (I) I like it!" and we also hear lots of "Wo yao (I want) go outside!!" Yesterday she said "wo xihuan shee-pool!" And for those who don't speak Hope, that means "*I* like school!" I think she is tired of watching Lilla go to that fun place every day and she has to stay in the car. Lilla's favorite game in the car is to say "Song Yi, say--" and she gets her to repeat word after word, and her sis is a very willing partcipant. They are playing together pretty well, but definitely are like two monkeys at bedtime, keeping each other awake.

So, the doctor...opthomologist Monday. He wasn't really interested in her eye. Well, he checked her "good" eye pretty thoroughly and prescribed glasses to protect her eye. It is very healthy and her vision is good. Great news! I think next month is when we will find out more. We will see an ocularist, which is a very interesting doctor who specializes in treating people who are missing eyes, whether by birth, disease or accident. They are artists as well because they create and hand paint the prosthetic eye. The opthomologist was very hopeful that Hope Song Yi would one day look very balanced, but it will be quite a bit of work and a long journey because she has been so long without an eye that gradually they will need to use expanders to create space in her socket. Also he said her eye opening is quite small on that side and will likely require surgery. She is SUCH a good patient. We were there 2 hours and had to move from room to room for different equipment, eye drops etc and she did great.

In other eye news, lilla went to the optometrist yesterday and we found out she needs glasses. She is near sighted. So both girls picked out frames yesterday and will have their glasses in about 2 weeks. Lilla picked spiffy red frames and Hope picked pink with flowers on the side. they look quite cute!

The pediatrician visit for Hope was uneventful (by the way we are now calling her Hope Song Yi to her face and Hope amongst ourselves)and tomorrow we will get blood work done to check her titers (to see what vaccines she got that actually gave her immunity) and other stuff, including the juvenile arthritis screening (because of her toes). We are supposed to take a stool sample too :-(. When I explained that to her and acted it all out so she would understand (so help me if someone puts me on Candid Camera or something) she was NOT happy about that. We'll see.

Oh, and thankfully, we had no real water damage from the flooding, just water in the crawl space but it seems Mark was able to catch it in time and is airing it out with fans each day. Time's up!!!

Here's a picture of the kids during the storm--they played outside during the worst of it!!


The newest member of our Rock Band...


This girl can have FUN with a box!!


The best surprise yesterday--Jake and Landon cleaned and vacuumed the playroom when I was gone with the girls getting glasses!

Some photos--do you think she feels at home yet? :-)

Today we went to church for the first time since we have been home. It was so nice to be among friends! I started crying practically as soon as I sat down. I had Song Yi in my lap and I was just thinking of all the YEARS that I prayed that we would be able to adopt again and here she was, proof of God's faithfulness and care. We have so much to be thankful for! I was making a mental list of the good, right after having a not so good lunch where I can't even remember what I ate I was up and down from the table so much trying to use my ESP to see what Little Miss Bu yao wanted. Between me getting up, she kept getting her hands dirty on purpose and insisting I wipe them. And refusing food she ate a few days ago, only to eat a ton of it about 10 minutes later, after she put all hers on my plate. I want to know how to say "Girl, we know you like tater tots" in Chinese.

I emailed my group that is for adopting older kids to see what they think about continuing the babyish behaviors like wanting to be carried, wanting me to wipe her hands, put her shoes on, help her go potty, get her dressed, all things I know she can do but she wants me to do for her. So far I am just doing it, thinking maybe it is her wanting to subconsciously re-live some stuff we didn't do together. I am annoyed by too much psychology but when you're talking about a little soul that has been through a lot, can't hurt to think it through. It is all good until Lilla wants the same treatment and then I just can't take it. How people live with 2 year old twins i will never know.

So thankful that Song Yi is sleeping, looking us in the eye, smiling, giving hugs, trying out her English, laughing, playing, listening to stories, playing Play Dough and sleeping!!! I can't believe we have only known her for 3 weeks.

I have to get Mark to put up video of all the kids running around like maniacs last night right before bed. It was FUNNY. but when it was time for bed, Song Yi wanted to take all her dress up stuff she was wearing and put it in her personal drawer. I call her (in my head) "the confiscator" because if she wants it, she tries to take it for her own. Thankfully she listens to reason and I was able to show her that dress up clothes are community property.

Tomorrow she goes for her check up. I will take an Oglethorpe student with us who is from Shanghai in case we need translating, since there will be much poking and prodding. We met her last week and she was awesome. But as soon as Song Yi saw her and the girl spoke Chinese to her, she froze. Her eyes got teary and she was clinging on to me for dear life. She wouldn't get down, wouldn't talk to the girl. We explained in English and Chinese that this was a friend, Song Yi was staying with mommy, we were just chatting...she didn't want a thing to do with it. She only relaxed her death grip and looked happy when we said goodbye! I wonder what she was thinking. I remember when I was in France studying and living with a French family, I was so relieved to speak English from time to time, so relaxing not to have to concentrate so hard to communicate. Well, not the same for kids in this situation I guess. I had heard of kids having this reaction but really wasn't expecting it.

Mark starts slowly back to work tomorrow...I am terrified! How will I do this?? Thankfully he works from home and can help out as needed as I get the hang of this mom to 4 life.

Here's a photo post. Who knew you could have so much fun with 2 buckets and a hose?

Lilla's first day (can you tell she was a little concerned? all went well.)



Little Miss all decked out to party



Landon--his true self, always.



Thank goodness for this solid citizen! He has been so patient.

Thanks for all the encouraging comments and emails! Tuesday and today were much better, but still quite exhausting. I am starting to remember what it was like when I had a newborn and a toddler! Not a moment to myself and heaven forbid I should turn my back for a minute. But I thought I would update since we got them in bed early...

We did have a successful 1 minute timeout yesterday, also for hitting me. I can understand that it is because she can't communicate the way she wants to with us, and I told Mark today I think once we can talk she will be quite delightful. I mean she is now but she will be delightful and a little more able to be on her own. Sometimes she gets my attention and whispers to me in Chinese, like a secret, which is cute. Today she was telling me the same thing again and again and making some hand motions and for the life of me I couldn't figure it out. So I put on a sad, regretful look and said "I don't speak Chinese" in Chinese (I would put it here but I can't spell it). She cracked up, which is what she usually does when I try out my little bit of Chinese I know.

She has started repeating everything we say, if prompted. She says "Go Outside!" a lot and also "see you later" and "all done" and Mark heard an unprompted "thank you" yesterday. The language part is really fun, when it is not frustrating! It reminds me of when the other kids were about 10-11 months old and started bursting forth with new words every day.

Yesterday Lilla went to school for 3 hours and had a good time. Mark and I also took Jake and Landon to their homeschooling co-op classes (which they loved, thank you God!). They took Little House on the Prairie (fun, lots of crafts, food, music etc from the period), science and writing. In the meantime we took Lilla for her 5 year check up and also got Song Yi's feet checked out.

The doctor wants to do some blood tests because she said it looks like something joint/inflammatory and she actually was quite baffled. She also said she would consider gout except she has never in 25 years seen a child with gout. For now she is on a steroid which has helped tremendously and we will take her next week for bloodwork. Also later this month, Lilla and Song Yi both go to the opthamologist AND Landon needs to see the ENT. Song Yi and I also need to go to the dentist!

Also, we all slept mostly all night last night! And we are skipping naps because we prefer night time sleep. But like I said before, mama needs a rest so today I tried to introduce the concept of alone time to Song Yi, using this big visual timer we have, with a red disc that disappears as the time passes (love it!) she was quite baffled but went along. Hopefully if I keep putting her back in the room and pointing at the timer and miming "mama rest" she will get it. I hate to say Lilla was not much help today in demonstrating the proper way to do alone time...

Okay I think this day falls under a "two steps back" day. I wouldn't post because I am very tired but maybe it will get it out of my system and also help people see just why it appears we have dropped off the earth...
We went to bed around 9pm last night. Maybe 9:30. Song Yi woke up at 12 crying about her feet. She cried at bedtime too and after googling I swear her symptoms are just like gout. Her two big toes are swollen, red-purple on the underside and very much in pain. I will take her to the dr. tomorrow if it is not better. So Mark got up for that and I was awake until about 2am for no reason (Mark until 3am), with Lilla waking up at 1am with a bad dream. Then thankfully we all slept until around 7am but Mark and I were very groggy. Could be our good friend melatonin turned on us and we should take less. Only took 1-2mg though

Then all the kids sat and watched America's Funniest Home Videos--yes! That is the first I have seen Song Yi watch TV. Yes, I need my kids to watch TV, at least a little bit. It is quiet, calm and makes no mess. I took a picture but don't know where the camera is. After breakfast and getting ready (very tiring with a 5 year old who acts 3) Song Yi got in Landon's bed with him and they read books quite peacefully, then she got down. During that time I cleaned the kitchen. Lilla tried next and that made SY very mad. Lilla was only up there about 3 minutes anyway...So I got SY to come and water color. She wants me to hold the brush and she bosses around where my hand should go. I play along until she gets mad when the pictures don't turn out right and she blames me.

Then Lilla came to paint and they had to share paint and as you can imagine SY was NOT happy. Very--well let's say it rhymes with "sissy" and starts with a "p". Grabbing the paint, pushing Lilla away etc. Finally we decided to go for a walk. I think that was after much toe rubbing on my part at some point. Me rubbing SY's toes that is. We let Jake stay home because he hasn't been feeling great, just a cold. So we killed an hour or so walking. I enjoyed being with Landon but I really feel like Mark and I were just trying to survive until rest time.

Got home and had lunch. Lots of wo bu yao's from SY (I don't like it!) and she just wanted to eat ranch flavored Pringles but we got her to at least eat some oranges too. After MUCH toe rubbing I was able to leave her in the room and then went to see Lilla, who is now napping in the office. Read her a story and chatted and then tried to get some peace and quiet but was interrupted for the next hour or so by people with sore feet, people who were thinking of scary things, people who aren't tired (don't they see that THAT is not really the point of rest time! MOMMY is tired) blah blah blah. Unfortunately, Jake and Landon played video games for about 2.5 hours today. I had a nice little cry time with the Lord and then tried to sleep. Along the what-have-we-done-okay-Lord-I-know-you-brought-me-this-far-and-won't-leave-me type of prayers. Thank goodness I also prayed for supernatural patience...

Snack after nap and much crying about toes. So I rubbed her toes for about 20 minutes straight and finally said my hands needed a rest. Then Lilla came and sat with us and watch out! SY does not like to share mommy's lap and tried everything she could to get Lilla to leave. I told her I love her AND I love Lilla (in Chinese) and she said very sweetly (not) WO AI BABA. (I love daddy). And then she got down and was creeping around behind the chair we were in and I think she whacked me on the head. At the time I thought it was Landon roughhousing but he said it wasn't him. Ahhh.

More painting, colored peg things and a rubber band thingy activity for SY. SY was repeating her colors pretty well and grouping the pegs by color so that is good. All the other kids were playing outside with Mark. So I made dinner (lots more wo bu yaos!). At meals, I am trying to have things SY likes and things we like. We like Chinese food but I don't want rice and noodles every meal including breakfast and until we can talk to each other I am not going to try to make her eat lasagna or anything like that, which is pretty disgusting to most Asian palates with all the cheese (no one brought lasagna that is just a hypothetical).

So we sat down to eat and had taquitos (wo bu yao!), veggies, rice and black beans. I usually give SY a little container of soy sauce for her rice. And she kept asking and asking for it and we kept saying yes, yes you can have it just a minute. I was still getting all the food on the table etc. And then when I gave her the soy sauce apparently it was not the right amount and she tried to swat me, not playfully. So I picked her up and took her to the steps nearby and said "No No. Sit down." and pointed down. And she refused. So I mimed SY tried to hit mommy, no no, sit down and she refused. So I sat her down, not mean but I made her sit and she popped back up and crossed her arms and glared. So we went through it again. Sit. Down. And I sat her down and said No hitting.

Oh my gosh. Well, now I remember what her screaming sounded like when we met her. The girl does not like to do what she doesn't want to do. She screamed like a banshee. I sat right by her and put my hands on her gently and said it's okay, I love you etc. But I didn't try to apease her, just be nearby during the meltdown. And we sat and sat and finally I picked her up and took her to the sofa and she tried to fight me, scratching and stuff but I held her hands and she kept wailing and trying to push me away. But I just had this feeling that I should not let her go. I wasn't forcibly holding her but I was persistent. I would say she was out of her right mind at this point wailing. Finally after about 20 minutes or so (all I know is everyone was done eating when we came back) I could tell her feet were hurting so I rubbed her toes and finally she let me.

So suddenly she was quiet and I rubbed her toes and I said it's okay, I love you and finally she said hao ah (okay) and we got up and I gave her a tight squeeze and she squeezed back and she went back to the table happy as a clam, like the sunshine after a storm. Very interesting. My guess is that she got away with a lot in her early life because of her eye and her cuteness. And as far as I can tell the Chinese tend to appease and cajole children, bribing with candy or just trying to keep them happy. Forgive me if you are Chinese and don't do this but I have observed it quite a bit. And I am sure she didn't know exactly what to expect with her first real measure of discipline, and she is probably still stressed out being with people in a strange house who don't really understand her who she just met in China 2 weeks ago.

Lots more tiring stuff happened after that but the good news is that Lilla got in trouble later and I told her to go sit on the step and I saw SY observing very closely what went down. She said Ca MA? which is like "what is going on/what are you doing?" and I said mommy told Lilla No No. And she was like hmmmm....

Long drawn out bedtime (feet hurting, Lilla doing gymnastics) and now here I am and I need to go to bed myself. Oh, one bright spot at bedtime is that Sy will now imitate praying. She has seen people do it before and mimicked it at the Buddhist temple. So Lilla prayed and then me and then SY said "wo" (me) and let loose with Baba, Mama, Song Yi, Lilla...and then went through it again throwing in some blah blah blahs like she was imitating English. Very sweet and she closed her eyes and folded her hands too.

Came across these verses yet again today (from Psalm 33) May it be in my heart.

But the eyes of the LORD are on those who fear him,
on those whose hope is in his unfailing love,
to deliver them from death
and keep them alive in famine.
We wait in hope for the LORD;
he is our help and our shield.
In him our hearts rejoice,
for we trust in his holy name.
May your unfailing love rest upon us, O LORD,
even as we put our hope in you.

Grandparents came to visit last night and that was fun.

Jake and Landon are being their awesome selves and I am very thankful for their patience.

Found the camera. Feeding ducks yesterday, TV today.

Wow, melatonin really works!! We all slept about 8 hours last night, I think, and I don't feel like I will die of it anymore. Thanks for the prayers! But I really am still not checking emails or returning phone calls much, so please don't be offended :-) Still trying to get my head above water over here. Plenty of food and offers for food, so thank you all! Lilla needs prayers. I think she is struggling a lot and it is coming out in the form of attention seeking of any kind. We are trying to respond well and I am trying to pay good proactive attention to her but it is hard with a 5 yeard old who acts like a 3 year old around. She and Song Yi are playing better together so that is good. Today we did lacing cards, watercolor, walked to the park and lake and fed the ducks, ate lunch and read books and now they are resting. Jake and Landon did the playground and lake part and now they are happily playing video games with daddy. I have been cleaning out the suitcases and drinking coffee :-). Song Yi's feet are hurting and she is wanting bandaids all over them and it is driving me crazy, especially since the reason her feet hurt is she has been insisting on using these high heeled dress up shoes as her slippers! We finally hid them this morning so she can't do that anymore. Anyway, we're alive, but didn't make it to church.

I am just wondering if anyone has ever died of jet lag. We were exhausted all day yesterday but only took a 2 hour nap around noon-2pm. Last night, the girls went to bed around 8pm and the rest of us around 9pm. I woke up at 11pm (yes 2 hours later) and I saw Song Yi in the bathroom, already up. I never really fell asleep very long after that and I heard the girls playing off and on after that too. I finally got up at 4am. Ugh!!! We took a 2.5 hour nap today and forced ourselves up at 2:30pm. Tonight we will try melatonin. We aren't really taking visitors right now because of this but maybe we will be at church tomorrow. After all if we wake up at 4am, why not? I can see why sleep deprivation is a torture device...

How about another round of pictures? Sorry we couldn't get more up here while we were in China. Between being busy, bad bandwidth and expensive Internet at the hotel and having to VPN through work (since Facebook, Blogspot and many many others are blocked in China) - it was painful to get stuff posted.


Mama does some shopping for Chinese outfits at Jordon's while the girls enjoy some popsicles...


Posing together at the Chen Family Temple/Museum/Homesite. They tolerated each other for about the 2 seconds you see here... :)




This was the typical scene if we ended up eating in the room - which was a lot. Invariably, Song Yi was the last one putting it away. I don't know where she puts all that food.


Lilla posing with her new outfit...


... and Song Yi, too. (note the Hello Kitty tennis shoes. These are not traditional Chinese garb.)


By the time we got to posing in front of the fountain with our guide, Helen, most of the kids were more than done. It was getting too hot in those outfits, even in the hotel lobby.


Zonked out on the plane. Katy only took this picture because that's Song Yi's foot next to Lilla's face. They slept like this for more than an hour and every time Song Yi moved, she was kicking Lilla. But Lilla was so tired, she never even noticed.


Yay! Welcome home! Thanks to the Pilkentons and McCauleys for the welcome home balloons, banner and Dan for the food!

Well, it is 6:45am on Friday and we are all up over here at the Tubesing house. Our trip yesterday went very well (all considering) so thank you to whoever prayed. So on the flight from Guangzhou to Beijing, Lilla and Song Yi were content drawing (and making Mark and I draw) most of the time, so that was easy, and they also both slept for about an hour. In Beijing, we had a pretty short layover, so we walked around a bit and couldn't find much food, only duty free shops. We had to spend the rest of our RMB, so Mark bought juice for all which unfortunately was confiscated at the gate even though we bought the juice after we went through security...

We stayed healthy, we caught all of our flights, and we even got upgraded to "Economy Plus" on the Beijing-Chicago leg (aka the way economy seats used to be configured before they started wedging people in like sardines). So we had a little extra legroom and space to spread out on the long flight. Thankfully they fixed our seats as they originally had Song Yi sitting by herself about 4 rows up! Song Yi liked the in seat entertainment and tried to take the ear buds provided by the airline from all her neighboring passengers. Besides having to take Song Yi to the potty about 85 times, the flight went smoothly. I am so glad to be home where I don't have to squeeze myself and child into a 2 x 2 disgusting bathroom, all while one of them is screaming (sometimes me) because the potty is dirty, loud or the seat is too big.

Song Yi slept about 7 hours total on the flight and Lilla slept about 4. Mark and I slept about an hour or so each unfortunately. They did really well and enjoyed sticking stickers on paper more than you would think possible. And they each ate about 5 Dum Dums suckers which always helps pass the time. I feel certain that Song Yi has had more sugar in the last 2 weeks than in the rest of her life. I feel kinda bad about that...

If this post seems incoherent it is because I am stopping every 1.5 minutes to talk to the kids, put on a band-aid, tell someone she can't get in the fireplace, protect the guinea pig...you get the idea. Song Yi is intellectually 5 years old, but because of the language barrier and her lack of life experience, it is more like having a 3 year old for now.

So landing in Chicago we felt so good like, ahhh back in the USA, the journey is nearly over, there's no place like home. WELL, not so fast. It was a poorly run nuthouse. First we were told by our agency several different times that we had to get in the VISITOR line to go through customs because of Song Yi's passport (M:She travels on a Chinese passport with US Visa for the time being). So we did. And apparently it is generally known to be the line where all cultures where shoving and breaking in line is okay. Besides some well behaved Australians I noticed, it was a jostle fest. (M: I think this is definitely one of those cultural things where we think of Asians as very ordered and fair. That is apparently a Japanese convention. Chinese...ahh... not so much.) We had to vigilantly keep our place in line and the line was LONG. We were there for about an hour and a half. With 2 tired 5 year olds, one too big to carry, one who doesn't want to move when the line moves (which makes it easy to jump us in line). FINALLY our travel mates, the Hales, flagged down an officer who said we could actually be in the citizen line. I actually called out Praise the Good Lord!! when she told us. So the officer who finally looked at our paperwork was very nice.

Then we had to claim our bags and and go to some "pen" and wait with other people who were trying to get green cards or become citizens. One lady told us she had been there nearly 3 hours. We hadn't had any water in several hours and the kids had HAD IT. The officers were kind of rude and I did feel so bad for the people who had been through who knows what to get to that point in life. One man who didn't speak much English was trying to ask an officer about food for his baby and the officer was like so? We didn't see water or bathrooms. Anyway, apparently and fortunately for us adoptions get bumped to the front of the line so we got out of there pretty quick. We then had to take our bags through customs and a security scan. Then we had to go to some madhouse of a rechecking luggage area where a lady was just kind of yelling out, drop your checked bags and go get your flight! (M: And the poor Chinese travel group didn't appear to have an English guide, so they were VERY confused. Did we mention it was nutty? Crazy airports and disoriented travelers are not what you look forward to after only having 2 hours of sleep in the last 24...)

So we did and then had to catch a train to the proper terminal. At this point I could tell Song Yi was like what the $%#@ is going on here! After the train we had to wait in line again with 2 very tired 5 year olds and go through security AGAIN and at this point we were so thirsty I was about delirious. So even though we had a 3 hour layover, as we got to our gate, the plane was boarding! Mark ran and bought us some water and popcorn and I thought so help me if they confiscate this water I will cry! They didn't thankfully and we got on the plane. I spent most of my time back and forth in the potty which was mercifully clean. Song Yi says something that sounds like wo wo liao for potty and it is usually in a panicked voice. So now whenever Mark and I have to go, we like to say WO WO LIAO!!!

Ahhh, landed in the ATL and immediately saw grammy and grampy waiting for us. Song Yi went right to them and said Hello! Then we saw granddaddy and she went right to him and gave a hug. Lilla was happy to see some familiar faces too. Remember the madhouse bag rechecking area? Apparently one of our bags was misloaded in the melee and it was not in Atlanta when we were. We are hoping to get that early today. Okay have to let Mark finish this one...Lilla is actually going to school today for a little meet the teacher time. (M: consider it finished for now. :) I'm so exhausted and the day hasn't even started.)